


unimaginable

by gingergenower



Category: Avengers: Infinity War - Fandom, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Heavy Angst, Infinity War spoilers, the avengers better do the avenging thing in part 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-30 17:53:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14502369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gingergenower/pseuds/gingergenower
Summary: There’s no one to tell.INFINITY WAR SPOILERS INFINITY WAR SPOILERS INFINITY WAR SPOILERS INFINITY WAR SPOILERS INFINITY WAR SPOILERS





	unimaginable

**Author's Note:**

> title inspired by [It's Quiet Uptown](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F2rS-ZOCoLo) by Lin Manuel Miranda

Tony bunny hops the alien system’s signal off the nearest radio tower as soon as he’s in the atmosphere. He’s only just familiar enough with the controls after travelling halfway across the galaxy that he can concentrate on typing in the phone number, and he’ll never be ready.

He doesn’t have the strength in him to decide what he’s going to say, he’ll just have to talk, already numb with fear and grief.

It rings, and rings, and rings, and the cool female voice asks him to leave a message.

Ending the call, he tries again, and she doesn’t answer. He tries the home number, and there’s nothing. It rings out.

Eyes squeezing shut, hands balled into helpless fists, his grief swells into rage. Why isn’t she waiting by the phone, has she not _noticed_ , why isn’t she-

He blinks, looking at the numbers flashing at him from the screen. Finger hovering over the button for a moment, he cancels the call he’s halfway through making.

May’s gone too. There’s no one to tell.

Slowly, swallowing, he stares at the keypad. The second call…

Hands shaking, barely able to hit the right buttons, he knows this number by heart, too, stabbing it into his rerouted system and holding the speaker to his lips, listening carefully, every ring a second closer to her being gone.

Pepper’s dull, crackled voice cuts his strings and he can hardly breathe, heart spluttering in protest.

‘ _Hello_?’

‘Hey,’ he says, and it’s all he can manage, but it’s enough.

She starts talking, _begging_ him to tell her he’s alright, he’s alive, but he can’t speak, can only listen, lungs tight and tears falling and holding onto the sound of her. She’s not dead, she’s scared and crying and she thought he was dead too but it doesn’t matter. She’s alive.

‘ _Tony, please, are you_ -’

‘I’m coming home,’ he says, and she sobs.

 ‘- _are you ok_?’

She’s alive she’s alive _she’s alive_. ‘Fine,’ he says, fingers touching the hole Thanos stabbed through him.

It’s over. There’s no salvaging this.

‘The kid’s gone.’

She only misses a beat. ‘ _The- Peter_?’

‘He’s dead,’ he says, the most level thing he’s said out loud. ‘I can’t get through to his aunt, I think she’s gone too.’

‘ _Peter’s dead_?’ Her voice cracks.

He turned to dust in Tony’s hands, still stuck under his fingernails. There isn’t even a body to bury. ‘Yeah.’

‘ _They’re- they’re saying half the world, it looks like half the world_ -’

‘They’re all dead.’

Pepper falls silent, and he knows that means she’s crying, and he wants to reach out to her but he doesn’t even know where to begin with this grief.

Peter was a kid, he was fifteen and _begging_ for his life and there was nothing Tony could do, every measure he’s put in place to save him turning to ashes with his body. If he’d been killed by any other means, he could’ve thrown himself in the way, taken the bullet. He couldn’t prevent the undoing of the structural integrity of his biological matter.

He wonders, for a second, if he could find Thanos and beg for him to bring Peter back and take him instead, but it’s won’t be enough. Nothing will ever be enough. It’ll be half of everyone he knows if he’s _lucky_ , only half of the people he loves-

Half of the people he should have saved.

Is he supposed to be able to understand? Is he supposed to move on? Is he supposed to be able to live with it?

Tony doesn’t know how he’s supposed to live with this.

He’s hardly listening when Pepper starts talking again, voice choked, trying to keep it together. ‘ _I got- a message, from the Avengers. From Steve_.’

‘And?’

‘ _He said he had an idea_ ,’ she says, soft. ‘ _Something about- a time stone?_ ’

Tony flinches. Thanos has what he wants. Peter and May and the rest of the goddamn planet, they’re all dead, and he’s already won. There’s nothing any of them can do- except hope, wherever May and Peter are, they’re together and she’s giving him the hug Tony couldn’t; one that might make Peter feel safe, or comforted, or at least a little less afraid.

They don’t even know where Thanos is, and if they figure it out he’ll just kill them- he still has the gauntlet.

He raps his fingers against the controls, ignoring the tears rolling down his cheeks. If they could get the stones…

‘Where are they?’

**Author's Note:**

> I was braced for Tony dying. I could've handled it. what the FUCK Peter is a 15 year old KID if they don't save him I'M QUITTING MARVEL
> 
> EDIT: I have been informed Peter is 16/17 in Infinity War. I would like to change my stance to: what the FUCK Peter is a 16/17 year old KID if they don't save him I'M QUITTING MARVEL 
> 
> ;)


End file.
